When was the last time you laughed as you have never laughed before? When was the last time you experienced gratitude as you have never before? When was the last time you danced with moonbeams and sipped into the stars? Walked barefoot on the grass and dirtied your hands? When was the last time you did, or said something spontaneously without worrying about what others are thinking of you? When was the last time you made a fool of yourself and enjoyed it? When was the last time you did something for the first time? It’s worth thinking about it!
Human beings are gifted with the capability of loss of memory. Our minds can let go or erase many experiences we face in our life. By holding on to a certain set of negative memories we are going against the human design. So many people live most of their life, living up to other’s expectations of them. Let us not be one among that so many!
Let’s let go of the past and live life gloriously. Letting go is to stop thinking about someone, something, or some experience that annoyed or troubled you. It’s your maturity to move forward from where you are now to where you want to be in the future.
Letting go is one quality each individual needs to develop. It’s the lack of this quality that leads to unhappiness and low productivity. Letting go is an effect and growth which an individual experiences when they can manage their mind and its emotions. Letting go means to stop holding on to something or someone. It means accepting life’s experiences you can’t change and doing something about things you can.
Many people are finding it difficult to let go because of various reasons. The exaggerated value we associate with people, positions, and possessions appear to be a major reason people find it difficult to let go. When we define our life with these sources – people, positions, and possessions, they gain enormous importance in our life. The greater the importance is given, the more value you associate, and it takes priority in your time and effort.
Another reason is the unreasonable expectations you have in life. When you are result oriented, you work for future goals. Nothing wrong with it but when you are obsessed with gaining results, you will find it difficult to let go.
For some people, the pleasure derived is maximum from contact with a person or an object. They have made dependent on these factors for their happiness. They are ignorant as to the source of happiness. Such dependency on objects and beings makes it difficult to let go.
One more reason seems to be the future imagined with a person and the positions you hold at work. You have planned to grow and age gracefully with a particular person, and you have envisioned contributing and leaving a legacy through your work. When there is a disruption or a setback in life and your position is threatened or the person is forcefully taken away from you, you find it very difficult to let go.
When your choices are influenced by your attachments to people and positions and your ego gains satisfaction through these sources, it becomes extremely difficult to let go. Your attachment and ego create possessiveness. It’s the thought – This is mine, I need you and your lack of self-sufficiency makes it difficult in letting go.
We believe that it is difficult to let go but in truth, it is much more difficult and painful to hold and protect. Reflect upon anything in your life that you grasp hold of – an opinion, a historical resentment, an ambition, or an unfulfilled fantasy, sense a tightness, fear, and defensiveness that surrounds the grasping. It’s a painful, anxious experience of unhappiness. We do not let go to make ourselves impoverished or bereft. We let go to discover peace and happiness.
Chinese philosopher, Tao Te Ching says “When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. When I let go of what I have, I receive what I need.” Have you ever struggled to find work or love, only to find it after you have given up after let go. This is the paradox of letting go.
Text by S A Sreedharan
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